but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
