Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
