Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize
