At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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