How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
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