He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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