omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
