i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Some girl dressed in nothing but Wonder Woman underwear and a cape on her ass just started twerking all over us. Remind me why I'd never been to a midnight of Rocky horror before?
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
