This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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