we're blogging at a bar
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize