Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Randomize
