I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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