i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
