Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
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