Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
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