In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
babies were throwing up all over the place
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Randomize
