Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
