I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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