you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
