i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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