There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
