The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
Randomize
