omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
