How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
