New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
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