what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I want her autograph on my taint
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
