But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
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