We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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