I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
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