I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
