Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
