Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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