She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
