not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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