I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Randomize
