you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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