YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I think a kid would responsible me up
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
