Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize