Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I said "one day" and that day is not today
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
