we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
