Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
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