Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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