It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Randomize