I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Randomize
