Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
