I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Randomize
