every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
My apartment stinks of burning failure
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