Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
