if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
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