Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I touched a dick in church today
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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