Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Randomize
