Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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