I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Randomize
